yesterday was leavers' day at college. those of us who return next term have another week. lots of people were packing up today, removal vans galore and many people standing around looking dazed. most of my close friends are in my year, so not leaving yet, but i do have one beautiful friend who left yesterday and i feel slightly bereft. i am sitting here drinking diet coke, so i raise my glass to him - go well my friend.


Fern Winter said...

Hi Jody, this isn't a comment on the particular post title, more a reflection on what you've been writing recently on your 'lack of fit' with college. Firstly, I'm so very sorry that you've been having difficulties and writing as someone who feels they've never quite fitted anywhere, I know how intensely one can long for a 'place' in whatever 'world' we find ourselves. My own Jonny Baker experience, the equivalent of being told "you don't fit and that's your gift", is the person who said "you're not a comfortable person so why expect a comfortable life?" So yeah, but it's tough always feeling the outsider.

Forgive me if you've already spelled this out in early posts but what do you feel have been the main causes of these problems - if you don't want to go into it on a public board, then email me - no pressure obviously. It's just hard to see someone so passionate for the gospel as yourself sounding so down and not want to help.

One of my favourite quotes is from Macbeth, "come what come may, time and the hour run through the roughest day". All of this will one day be past. And you will be a blessing to God's people.
Fern Winter

radical evangelical said...

hi fern

thanks for your kind words. i have not gone into the particular reasons for why i am at this point.

some things just aren't for saying publicly as you acknowledge, but i guess the effect for me is cumulative - rather like a drip drip effect and suddenly you realise that you're drowning.

so i guess for me the gospel becomes absolutely lived out in the daily discipleship of being who God made me to be in the place where God has put me. because i can't do anything else.

Fern Winter said...

Jody, yes, sometimes all we can do is hunker down, endure and suck it up. I will add that sometimes what we feel and perceive isn't always a reliable guide to how things actually are. You may feel you're drowning but I'll guarantee there are others thinking, "that Jody, she's a strong swimmer, she keeps her head above the waves".

Stay well and strong.